Who weighs you down?

Who weighs you down? By that I mean what pessimistic people weigh you down? They do more than have a negative attitude or a sour outlook on life. They can bring you down and more often than not, the clues are so subtle that it’s very easy to miss them.

Think about the people in your life. Now think about the ones that often belittle others, making cutting remarks even to you, and pass it off as “just joking”. They’re judgmental and are constantly pointing out the negative in you as well as life in general.

Do you know people who remove all the positive and leave the negative. When they enter a room, all that’s good has just been sucked dry. These are the people who, when you get done having a conversation with them, make you feel drained. You feel bad about yourself and bad about your life.

You might not recognize the damage that’s being done to you by the pessimistic people in your life. Here are some signs that you’ve been affected by a pessimistic person:

* After spending time in their presence, you find yourself edgy, jittery, and often turning to behavior that’s no good for you. For example, you might want to drink more alcohol to dull the moodiness they’ve created in you. Perhaps you might want to turn to calorie laden foods and just binge.

* Pessimistic people are often dramatic. No one has a life as bad as theirs. No matter what you or anyone says, it never helps. You hate the thought of getting trapped in conversation with this person because you know it’s going to be a whiny barrage of how awful his or her life is.

* Negative people will try to make you feel guilty about your life versus theirs. For example, they might have financial woes and try to make you feel guilty that you’re more financially stable.

* A person that’s no good for you will not be happy for you in your time of happiness. They will try to take the joy out of your joy.

Not all relationships are good for you, even if it’s a family member. You might not be able to avoid them completely, but you might consider trying to avoid getting cornered and drawn into a long conversation.

You cannot change people who have a pessimistic outlook on life. It’s not your job to do that. What you can do is protect your own emotional and mental health by cultivating friends that are positive and loving. These relationships give you the freedom to grow without getting showered by negativity. A friend will support you and will speak the truth to you in a way that doesn’t tear you down.

Who weighs you down? I’m interested in any thoughts or comments that you have.

2 thoughts on “Who weighs you down?”

  1. Oh, my God. My young adult children and I were dropped into a family of toxic people! Have had to distance ourselves from my father, brother and sister. Currently struggling to survive in another toxic situation because I am homeless and recently unemployed. Aunt invited me to stay w/ her while I look for another job, but damn it, she’s as bad as they are! Find myself so overwhelmed and toxed-out that I entertain suicidal thoughts. I can’t find any place else to go. Last week, I spent a frigid night sleeping in my car, in a hotel parking lot, rather than return to her house.

    1. You might want to check with a social service agencies such as Salvation Army, Catholic Charities, etc to seek counseling and housing help. Don’t lose hope! There is not a shortage of help. It’s our inability to seek it.

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