#Highly Sensitive People: Do you regret things that you said in anger?

Do you regret things that you said in anger? I regret some things that I said to my late father, Matthew.

I worked in his business for nine years when I was in my twenties. We were at odds with each other personally and professionally. It’s very ironic that my father and I were very much alike yet the only people we couldn’t get along with were each other.

Looking back on those days, I wish that I knew about the concept of high sensitivity since both of us were. I feel that we wouldn’t have said the hurtful things that we said to each other. We would’ve been more sensitive to each others feelings.

The hurt feelings that we had for each other lasted many years. We made peace with each other before he passed away. Anger was the main culprit that caused us to say the things that we said to each other. If we paused to think of the hurtful words we said, we wouldn’t have uttered them. Hurtful words do have long-lasting effects.

The lesson that I’ve learned is to take the time to think about what I say to anyone. I’m not perfect, but I’m getting better at taking a time out when saying something when I’m angry.

Do you regret things that you said in anger? I’m interested in any thoughts or comments that you have.

“Speak when you are angry and you’ll make the best speech you’ll ever regret.”…Ambrose Bierce

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5 Responses to #Highly Sensitive People: Do you regret things that you said in anger?

  1. janet says:

    I said things tonight that may be hurtful but they are true. I have a habit of closing my feelings down and letting things pass, but tonight I felt the need to speak up. My oldest granddaughter is 3 and still refuses to use the potty, she also has behavioral issues. I have tried to keep out of my son and daughter in-laws ways of raising them, but today they wanted my husband and I to watch them for 6 hours. They all live with us. We love them all so much, and was not hesitant to say yes. She had me so upset with her not listening, and ignoring me when I asked her to do simple things like pick up her toys before starting another activity. When my son and daughter in-law came home I explained to them that if they do not start teaching her to do these things that she is capable of doing I will not watch them anymore. It is not my responsibility, they need to get up and set some rules and bounderies, it is getting out of hand. We are in a small home with many people and I feel they are not respecting us and taking advantage. This created an argument between my son and my daughter in-law. Then it went one step further my husband told me to drop the subject, but he usually is the first to complain about them behind closed doors. I regret the after effects of my words but how can things change if nothing is said? I believe sometimes we are left with no choice to speak up. Does anyone have any ideas how to handle a situation, with people who are always pointing fingers at the other person, and say it’s not my fault her or she is the parent also. Any suggestions would be appreciated.

    • janet says:

      I meant to say he or she is the parent also.

    • Cliff Harwin says:

      Hi Janet,

      I understand saying a truthful statement that’s hurtful. I’ve done that! I’ve learned that I need to step back and not say anything that’s hurtful when I’m in an angry state of mind. It would be more helpful and less hurtful if you talked to your son and daughter in-law about your feelings when you’ve calmed down. You can state your feelings in a calm and controlled manner. Let them know how you feel, why you feel them, and why it would be beneficial for their daughter. You also need to set boundaries. They live in your house, don’t they? Your house, your rules! You might also consider getting outside counseling if you don’t feel you can handle it by yourself.

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    • Cliff Harwin says:

      Hi Archie,

      Thank you so much for your comments about my blog!

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