A Most Dreaded Word…Change!
Change is something that inevitably happens. It’s surprising that most people are unprepared or unwilling to cope with it. What is the cause of this anxiety? Could it be because we have to make (I’m getting heart palpitations as I write this), decisions?
Change is a difficult process because it involves letting go of an old situation, whether it be good or bad. It’s human nature to have anxiety when there is something different in our lives. Our angst intensifies because change involves the end of something comfortable and the start of something uncomfortable. It’s a new way of being.
We place a great deal of negative energy into our journey for change. It seems too much “work” is needed to get where we want to go. Perhaps it might be more productive to see this process as a way to clear the ground of our unhappiness (weeds), to make way for new growth, (flowers).
The most visible symptoms of a strong desire to make a change come from love relationships and vocation. These are critical aspects of our lives. If they aren’t working to our satisfaction, we become uncomfortable enough to force changes.
If your life is working somewhat, it’s very difficult to imagine an alternative way of life and an alternative identity.
When you look back on your life experience, it’s important to ask yourself some important questions. How have the major changes in your life come about? Was it because you initiated the change, or were you forced into it by circumstances?
It’s important to learn from our own experiences, as well as those of others, to chart our own path on coping with change. You must honestly look at your past (good and bad), and make adjustments to get to the kind of future that you want.
Change in a negative context can take a toll on us physically and emotionally. Simply put, change can make us sick and depressed. These aren’t ideal conditions to make the kind of changes that are conducive to a happy and productive life. Change doesn’t need to be looked at in a negative way. When you have to make a change, it means that something is wrong and needs to be fixed. Your life is fixable!
There is a feeling of unrest that can be healthy or unhealthy when change is needed. It can be healthy when it means that you are in touch with your needs. A healthy reaction would motivate you to do the things necessary to get what you want. An unhealthy reaction would make you sick and anxious and keep you in the rut that is making you sick and anxious.
When a change has to be made, it’s normal to think that you have to forget everything that you’ve done and have to start over. Why not take the things that you’ve learned and use these experiences to mold and shape the kind of life that you want for yourself?
Our desire for change most often comes when we are firmly entrenched within the many distractions of life. You have to make a living, have family obligations, and also have to deal with the many stresses that come along with these major components of our lives. Who has time to think about and deal with change?
Your answers will come when you have the awareness that something needs to be done. You will then be motivated to seek the information needed to take specific action. It’s important to realize that this process can evolve over time. You don’t have to quit your job or put your life on hold to make changes.
It’s important to look at the process of change in a realistic and positive way. It doesn’t have to be looked at as something to be dreaded. Make the time to incorporate some small action in your life everyday that will move you closer to what you want, no matter how small or insignificant it might seem. This IS the most realistic path to your best life.
What changes do you need to make? What steps can you take now. I’m interested in any thoughts or comments that you have.